Friend Worlds Away
by GrewUpScrewedUp
Summary: Double-D gets a laptop for his birthday, and Eddy convinces him to socialize. Who he finds is a certain Jew-boy miles away... What types of stories will be shared between the two unlikely boys?


Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from South Park or Ed Edd n Eddy. Though it'd be pretty frickin' awesome if I did.

I wrote this years ago. Heh, maybe I'll continue it...

* * *

It was another regular, monotonous day in the cul-de-sac and school had just let out. Ed, Eddy, and I were all heading for the junkyard to find more supplies for future scams. So far, everything is going according to plan. No interruptions from any of the other kids yet... and thankfully no sight of the Kankers or Kevin.

"Hey," Eddy called towards me, continuing his walk. "Did you really get a computer from your parents yesterday?"

My eyes darted behind us to check for any suspicious individuals who may be following, but there were none. Then I looked back at Eddy. "Yes, they did provide me with a computer. I awoke to find it sitting on the kitchen table with a sticky note on it that read: 'Dear Eddward, This is for all your hard work. Love, Mother' so I suppose she wants me to study with the new technology." I sighed from inner distress, and my friends gave me a strange look.

"Study?" Eddy repeated with a mixed tone of disgust and shock. Ed elbowed Eddy's shoulder and smiled happily at him for some reason. Yet again, I can't find reason behind most of what Ed does.

I nodded my head, still paranoid about my surroundings. "I've read a lot about computers and they were originally used for decoding and calculations, then the internet was created for military purposes but commercialism expanded the use and slowly the internet became something more of just a way to communicate."

I snapped out of my deep thoughts to see both Ed and Eddy staring at me with uncomprehending eyes. "YAWN," Eddy blurted out. "You know what I heard, Double-D?"

"What?" I questioned in a sarcastic tone.

"The internet is full of chat sites! Meet new people, screw 'em over..." He began rubbing his hands together as if he just thought of a sinister plot to scam the world.

"I don't believe the internet works that way, Eddy." A glare reached me immediately after the words left my mouth. "I would rather research nuclear fusion than speak to strangers whom I share no common interests with."

"Nuclear _what_?" He continued to stare at me incredulously while Ed became distracted by a butterfly flying nearby. "Look, the point is, it would be cool to talk to people you never met, right?" He seemed to ponder what he said for a moment, then added, "They might know more stuff than you."

My eyes widened in realization. Of course! There may be people out there who can inform me on matters that a regular article may not. "Eddy, that is a brilliant idea! Thank you!" He grinned in satisfaction as the junkyard came into sight.

"Smiles are like chickens!" Ed suddenly yelled, walking alongside us again.

The rest of the day passed by rather quickly. After we had gotten our supplies, we constructed (well... they were my blueprints) a large, spurious circus. Ed and Eddy abducted Rolf's animals and dressed them up as appalling creatures... then the "suckers" came to see what we were up to as usual. Eddy gathered his entrance fee and watched as the kids realized the whole event was a mockery. Rolf was especially angry with us, considering how we kidnapped his animals. After an unrelenting beating full of acrimonious statements, we went to our homes for dinner. My parents weren't home at the time, and they still aren't... but this is normal, I suppose. They are very busy adults and I respect their schedules.

All of my homework is already finished and my parents' gift to me is lying on the kitchen table. At first, an urge to study overcame me but it diminished when I remembered what Eddy told me earlier. Strangers are key holders of information as well... I must remember.

After I opened the folded device and turned the power on, I clicked on the 'Internet Explorer' icon and a page popped up that had the text 'Google' in multiple colors. _Interesting name,_ I thought. Since I assumed this was the search engine, I typed in "Talk to strangers" and hit the 'enter' key. About 47,300,000 results came up! I clicked on the first link. . On the following page, there was an introduction to the site, a place where you can type in your interests, and a highlighted box that says "Perverts not welcome." Hm... This website sounds pretty clean. I tapped the 'Text' button and it connected me with a stranger.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hello!

You: Hello.

Stranger: Hey, what's up?

You: Contemplating whether I should talk to strangers or study.

Stranger: Wow... That's the first time I heard that on here. Are you in college?

You: Far from it. I'm 13-years-old.

Stranger: Huh. Same here. What's your name?

You: My name is Eddward, but my friends call me Edd or Double-D. What's yours?

Stranger: Kyle. The nicknames my friends give me are all insulting, so I won't tell you them.

You: That's understandable. So what are you hoping to gain by talking to people whom you've never met?

Stranger: Well, I was hoping to just fulfill my social need by talking to people on here.

You: But didn't you say you have friends?

Stranger: Yes... It's complicated. I hang out with three people, yet I don't really talk to them nowadays. Stan is my best friend (he has been ignoring me due to his girlfriend), another is Kenny (him and I have never really been close), and the other is my enemy... Cartman. (Don't even get me started with him.)

You: Oh, my! The relationships between you and your friends are intriguing. Intimacy must be an issue. Interesting.

Stranger: Yeah. We all used to be close. What are your friends like?

You: I have two friends. Ed is very strong and dumb, but he's also very kind to everybody he meets. Eddy is extremely selfish and obsessed with money. He'll do anything for a quarter.

Stranger: Seems that the personalities vary in your group of friends too.

You: You're right, but wouldn't it be somewhat strange is we were all so much alike? Personalities should be unique.

Stranger: Hm... Yeah! =) That's the best statement I've heard this week.

You: Thank you, Kyle. I'm flattered.

Stranger: Cool. Uh... My mom wants me to watch my little brother. Do you have an e-mail?

You: No. Would you like me to make one real quick?

Stranger: That'd be awesome. Once you make it, send me an e-mail. Mine is 69ingchipmunks . Hopefully I'll talk to you later.

You: Yeah, thanks. Talk to you sometime soon then.

A smile was plastered on my face as I made my own Yahoo account.


End file.
